In which a health insurance company actually says something helpful

We have another 2 months here in the US but our health insurance is SO expensive and we have emergency cover from the UK, so Mr Spouse asked me whether I had any more upcoming appointments in March or whether it was going to be possible to cancel it.

I had the brilliant idea of calling them to ask (!) what would happen if we failed to renew, as we know that my short appointments are not that expensive out-of-pocket, but I wouldn't want to be taken off as a patient. In fact, if we wait till the end of March before paying March's bill and then call to cancel, they will actually charge us the lesser of a month's bill or the actual cost of services. Can you believe it? I was amazed.

In other news, a word to my body. This is how you are supposed to do a period:

Day 0/28: Spotting, if you absolutely have to.
Day 1: Heavy bleeding, require new tampon every 2-3 hours, large pad at night, fully able to go out of the house and stuff like that. Perhaps some Advil.
Day 2: Repeat, smaller pad at night.
Day 3: Smaller tampons, no pad at night.
Day 4-5: Spotting - liners possibly required.

This is NOT how you do it:
Days 22-24: Spotting, getting heavier.
Day 25/1: Dark blood but tampon definitely required. Also my birthday. Did I mention that? Now counting this as day 1.
Day 2: Heavier, as normal day 1.
Day 3: Sit down to breakfast out of hotel room, finish eating, feel awful, go back to hotel room, have soaked through tampon and stained jeans. Make it to convenience store for additional supplies but then lie down for rest of morning. Now afraid to stray more than 5 minutes from a loo for rest of day. Strangely almost nothing at night.
Day 4: Flow almost finished and just need liner.
Day 5: Don't even need liner.

I'm not quite sure what my body is on, but it also seems to involve heartburn, though that could be the many drinks I had to drown my sorrows at being Awfully Old, or (more worryingly) the baby aspirin.