Friday, September 29, 2006

I am married to a very lovely man

Yesterday I found out one of my colleagues is pregnant. This is quite an achievement as there are only twelve female members of staff in the department - two have school-aged kids "and that's enough", three are in their fifties or sixties, three have publicly declared they aren't up for commitment/of that sort (one single and complains to me about clingy men, one relishes her boyfriend being away at sea for four months at a time, and one happily coupled but childless), and one is also infertile. Which leaves J. Who has the office opposite mine. And who lives on my street. Closer to town. I have to walk past her office on the way to the photocopier and her house on the way to anywhere.

Now, I did think I was doing OK. I found out about the pregnancy (I think she must be about 5 months, but a clever dresser) during a day-long meeting where she was sitting opposite me, and I was OK - bored, but OK. Then when I got home I fell apart. Why does it still hurt? Why was I OK last time I got my period, but not on hearing that this very nice woman is pregnant? Will it still hurt if we have children but they are adopted?

Anyway unfortunately Mr Spouse had gone to see his mum after work and it's a long journey so by the time he spoke to me and realised how awful I was feeling he couldn't get home for a couple of hours. I moped in front of the telly with some soup and some cake and then had a hug when he got home. Today he left before I got up as usual and I'd said I was going to work from home - or possibly even call in sick, but in fact I had a lie in and felt much better so I went in late. And even managed not to have an extra coffee, which normally I need to perk me up when I'm feeling crap. So I got home and found...

a card saying there were flowers for me next door. He had sent me a bunch fo flowers! Isn't he sweet? He says it's in the appendix to the Husband Contract.


Thalia said...

I'm glad you've got such a lovely mine. Mine doesnt' seem to do flowers, not quite sure why. He does a lot of cooking, though.

Sorry to hear that pregnancy hit you hard. I think grief is like that, it comes and goes and it's hard to know what is going to set it off.

DinosaurD said...

Hum... could you please send a copy of the appendix over (our contract seems to have missed that).

perceval said...

Ditto - the grief comes and goes, and you never quite forget, even when you finally have kids.

annulla said...

Lovely, indeed.