Monday, February 27, 2012

Bringing it back

It is true what they say, that you don't magically cease to be infertile (or, though this is a bit more obvious since it is a historical fact, to be the parent of children who have died) once you become the parent of a living child (a very cute living child currently wearing a Small Paul t-shirt, $2 in the resale shop thank you very much, and throwing up over his Moses basket sheet, and yes I am supposed to be changing his sheet, not blogging in my pyjamas).

It seems to have hit Mr Spouse more than me, just now, as confronted with the reality of a baby (in fact, besotted with the reality of a baby, it is so sweet to watch him!). He was contemplating how many children we in fact would have had if either NigelandDelia or Sproutetta had been born, and the fact that probably Baby Spouse would not have been here in that case. I wondered whether even if we'd had NigelandDelia, we might have had the subsequent problems anyway, and as it was so many years down the line, perhaps Baby Spouse (in some incarnation) might also have been added to our family.


I had said when I got my implant, and I had continued to say, both to Mr Spouse and the GP, that an early removal might be on the cards if we had a baby in the house, and he (Mr Spouse) was much happier with the idea of trying to get pregnant (again, at my vastly advanced age) after we had a baby than while still waiting for one.  At the time he said that he thought I'd be able to cope better with another miscarriage if we have a baby we are parenting, and I think he's right. But he's not sure he can cope with more of that. I don't feel discussions are closed on that (but I also don't feel ready to have the implant taken out yet, either).  


I really hate that we have an eight week old baby and we already need to think about whether and how we might have a second child.  But time is ticking both for any magical pregnancy and also for adoption (while I'd love to have a grown up five year old to help with a new baby, that's not as likely to be practical from the point of view of, well, all kinds of stuff, though it might turn out that way).  Mr Spouse originally said we might think about adopting a second but it would definitely be an older baby or toddler, i.e. free. But I'm not sure if he'll change his mind on that one, seeing how besotted he is (see: very sweet to watch).  He is quite realistic about the fact that we have an easy baby and we might easily not have such an easy baby another time. He's an only child, and sees advantages and disadvantages of this for Baby Spouse.


In other random facts, we have worked out it costs £2 more to run our diswasher daily on the highest temperature setting. Per month, that is. I am fairly pleased to realise this as I have been avoiding buying a steriliser on the grounds that the kitchen is already crammed with useless stuff.

And finally a random question for Blogger users. How the H E Double Hockey Sticks (as they say on Big Love) do you make it start each post in the font you've asked for??!

1 comment:

Jo said...

I can't help you with the Blogger frustration -- I set mine up eons ago and don't have the patience to tinker with it any longer. :-) I don't even have a baby in the house (yet) and I worry too much about how we'll ever manage to conceive/adopt a second one. There are (too many) limitations out there -- I wish it were easier for all involved. Wishing you peace as you and Mr.Spouse try to figure it all out.

Hugs,
Jo