Monday, May 21, 2012

And on a more positive note...

I had a witty title for this but it's gone...

Anyway, Baby Spouse continues to be delightful and one of the most wonderful things about this whole being a parent thing is just how besotted Mr Spouse is with Baby Spouse.  He said the other day he wasn't sure about having a tiny baby as they "just lie there all day and sleep". Even given how addicted to sleeping Baby Spouse is, he is a delight to be with and incredibly rewarding to interact with* and very very smiley.  Daddy is the funniest person in the world EVER, apart from Mummy.

Our social worker is also a big fan of Baby Spouse and loves coming for her visits to us because she gets to hold him (much older adopted children who are not sure who they are supposed to be parented by will try and sit on social workers' laps, and this is to be discouraged; slightly older adopted children who are firmly attached to Mummy and Daddy would be scared of her; but he's too young to mind yet).

He still naps quite a lot (he's napping now, and I should be making my lunch, but am blogging instead) but there are moments when you think "what can I do with him, he doesn't want to sit in his bouncy chair and I can only amuse him for about 2 minutes with a rattle and I'm not about to put the TV on for him" but thank goodness for parent and baby groups I say, as I've settled into a routine of going to a few of these and he loves looking at the other babies and parents, and he is at least calm when in the pushchair or sling going there. We have a weekly (but highly interruptible) routine, and I'm thinking of being brave and going for a day's shopping in The City on the train soon, which he should be OK about as he'll like going on the train and looking at the people.

I still have not told any of the parents that I've met through these groups that we are adopting him** and it has not yet happened that any of the parents I knew already have been to the same groups as me, but our church has just started organising one and several people at church know we are adopting him so it's only a matter of time.  

I have said to people that it's not the first thing I say about him but it's not a secret, but now I'm second guessing myself as perhaps I am deliberately keeping it quiet? There is one baby at the main group I go to who has a hearing impairment, and when people find that out, they always want to talk about it, not in a negative way, but it is natural and I am as nosy as the next person.

*Except when he wakes up at 4.45 am to whinge about how he's just woken up, but isn't hungry, but would like someone to do something please. And then goes back to sleep 20 minutes later but I don't.

**At the moment, we say "we are adopting him" because we have not yet adopted him finally. But I'm not sure what we'll say in the future. I incline towards "we adopted him when he was a baby" rather than "he is adopted". 


nh said...

So glad to hear that you are still loving Baby Spouse. I hope that the sleeping continues well.

Rachel said...

I usually say "H was adopted," when I need to say something at all. Deciding when to tell and when not to tell is always a challenge. You don't want to keep it a secret or imply that it's shameful, but you also don't want to blab to the world that which is nobody's business. It gets easier as they get older.

And on your attachment post, I just want to say, "Right On!"

Rachel said...

Oh, and H was the least fussy and most easy-going kid when he was an infant. He slept well and he didn't cry. He is clearly attached to me -- but not too much as he is comfortable with strangers. I feel proud that I have made him so well adjusted, but honestly I think most of that stuff is genetic so I cannot take any credit at all for that part. ;)