Monday, January 21, 2008

Do I have the energy??!

With both of us being really sick last month while we were on holiday, not very much action took place (stop reading now if you really don't care!). I decided once we were hale and hearty that this month could be different.

We have a short trip over a weekend to a European capital, sounds perfect, especially (so those mice-and-men type plans went) given where it was in my cycle. But a lot of ganging agley has happened, with my cycle realigning itself earlier, and the three previous days being a work visit for me, and it looks like unless things get more delayed this cycle, we'll need to get active a few days earlier, and time it a bit better (I said stop reading - but basically morning I'm leaving on the trip, plus evening he joins me).

Question is, do I a) explain this to him in graphic detail or b) say I'm disappointed we'll miss the best days but can we do our best or c) not tell him anything and just try and persuade him I've been deprived/know I'm going to miss him loads??!

I have occasionally in the past suggested "the meter says today is a good day" and it's not been received totally negatively, but usually it's been in a situation where either today or tomorrow would do equally well. He doesn't have performance issues as such (the pointy pills, small yellow triangular ones not blue ones, are for his diabetes. The blue ones have to be taken on an empty stomach and interfere with digestion - how useful is that for diabetics who have to eat regularly?) but hates feeling pressured emotionally. He doesn't need the pointy pills that often, anyway, so it's not a case of needing advance notice.


Thalia said...

I've always struggled with this, too, whether to tell or not. I usually do tell, but I don't think it helps him. I hope you can get it together without too much stress.

May said...

I have never, ever, EVER, been able to deal well or gracefully with this issue. It's alright for me, all I have to do if I'm not in the mood is lie there like a concussed walrus and shout 'get on with it!' at intervals - for some reason H finds this a little unappealing - but if H isn't in the mood the stress! The stress! The resentment! Which, oddly, H also finds off-putting and unappealing - I mean, what could be sexier than a grumpy hormonal woman demanding favours with her arms crossed and her best scowl on?

Not that any of that was helpful. I hope it all works out.

Vivien said...

Hmmm - don't suppose this will help either, but I DO tell him - but with some notice (not days, but I have been known to send an email from work with an oblique 'today is a good day' sort of a message - and we usually laugh and get in the mood a bit, you know?
BTW - I have just caught up with a few of your more recent posts, because I too have not been reading or even posting all that much recently, but thought I should just point out I have not been matched, am not pg, and still stuck just where I was, what, 5 years ago, pretty much. Others move on, but not all of us!
Good luck with the adoption classes when they start. Have been there!