Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Confused? You will be, after this episode

I know we are.

So, to try and tell this in order, and not quite remembering what I've already said:

1) DCSF say no non-Hague adoptions from Hague countries
2) Kick-ass Solicitor says this is news to her, but she has other families in similar situations & will get back to us in about 3 weeks (2 weeks ago)
3) Supposedly helpful adoption advice organisation discusses situation at length by email and does not comprehend any of "birth mother can make best decision for child", "US feels placement with citizens abroad EQUALS placement in country" or "no agencies in US seem to want to do Hague outgoing" (18 months approx now and no cases have been through). Definitely not of same mind as KAS (i.e. client right).

4) We find agency in US that will attempt Hague outgoing. Not ideal demographic or location - you'd be truly stuffed if Hispanic - v. pricey and have never processed any cases, but we tell UK agency and KAS.

5) UK agency gives us place on August course. I have by now broken arm so not keen to sit still in pain for 4 days in July anyway.

6) Still crossing fingers DCSF will show pity/ be intimidated by KAS and not make us be guinea pigs with no choice of agency and no US precedent. Selfishly feel a non-US couple should be doing that. Bemoan not having done this 2 years ago. Point out to each other we were busy grieving 2 years ago.

7) Do many sums and conclude it would be cheaper for me to take approaching 2 years (to make immigration of child legal) off work, move back to the US, and get Mr. Spouse his green card so he can support me/us. Would also be cheaper. However wish to keep job/career, continue residence in long term in Small City In North, and have health care especially for Mr. Spouse that doesn't involve deterioration of his diabetes. Feel immediately post 6-week sick leave not best time to broach long term absence with employer.

8) Tired now.

(afraid Mr. Spouse is keen to leave this blog entirely to me - he neither reads nor comments)

3 comments:

Thalia said...

Umm, yes. Cannot pretend to understand what all of this means, but boy are you working to try and open some doors here. And while in pain, too. Hoping things get a little easier on multiple fronts soon.

Rachel said...

All I can say is, "Oy."

Lavender Luz said...

Wow! Now I have an idea of why you were asking about the states' stand on open records. Sounds like you have a lot going on.

Here's what I found. Could be a resource for you.

http://thesearchadvisor.com/states-open-adoption-records/

Good luck with the injury and everything else!