Monday, May 12, 2008

Step away from the Google

Not a huge issue really... Having been at a conference over the weekend (small, v. friendly, finally came out to my best gal-work-pal about the miscarriages and also to a woman who I know slightly less but who has been having a very difficult first trimester, and who started chatting to me about how badly informed she felt and how she got the impression she was just supposed to go away and put up with hyperemesis), I only just got a chance to call about my progesterone test. I think it was 28 (maybe 20!) which seems to be high? high normal? Anyway I'm not looking now, but have a telephone appointment with the GP on Thursday. I don't think she'll have any answers, though.

Of course this morning just as I surreptitiously put a small sample of FMU in the medicine cabinet (I wiped the bottle, don't worry) I noticed my period had started. I think I'm feeling extra bad about this one as it's the anniversary of my last miscarriage at the end of this month, and I can't help feeling sad about that, as well as worrying I won't have any more pregnancies either.

It felt really good to come out to C, who knew there were some "issues" but not really what they were. I've been kind of trying to tell her for a while, it just has been hard to bring it up - she started talking about her brother (who is an obstetrician) getting her sister-in-law in for extra scans so it finally seemed natural to bring it up - I related how Mr Spouse forgot that "normal people" don't get a scan till 12 weeks.

It was also good to rant about being told to "go away and come back when you are 12 weeks" to D. I don't know if D has any fertility issues but she is definitely a non-smug fertile - she says "I'm hoping to go on maternity leave in November".
Other Smug Lady Who Is Convinced Everything Is Pregnancy Or Child-Related said "D will be on maternity leave". She also said "ooh, my hair went curly once I had been pregnant". Well, my hair went curly in my 30s, before any pregnancies, but of course she didn't listen to my theory. D is in a study of stress (I think) and pregnancy, and we discussed my wild idea of planning research into CBT and miscarriage. I don't think this would be a good area for me to research as I don't know anything about CBT (other than "it's a good thing") but I'm just wondering if I might ask the GP to refer me again to a different psychologist (I suspect scary shirt man will have moved on by now).

1 comment:

Thalia said...

a psychologist friend of mine (quite a popularly famous one, initials are TB), is a big fan of CBT. Your research sounds really interesting, given the results st mary's have had on how TLC helps lower miscarriage rates in recurrent miscarriers.